Great News!

Including religion in your life can decrease your chances of dying!

After examining the prospective association of religious affiliation, religious service attendance, and strength and comfort derived from religion with subsequent cardiovascular events and overall rates of mortality, the researchers found that those attending religious services showed a 20 pct decrease in death risk.

I guess they didn't include Islam in their studies...

According to Israeli researchers, the average age of the suicide bomber has declined slightly from 22 in the 1990s to about 20 or 21 now.

Bassem Wahidi, the headmaster at Salahudeen School, said he and the staff will call the police, and then a boy's parents, if they learn that the boy is planning a suicide attack.

"You can't blame them for doing this, what with everything they see on TV, but we oppose it because they have a future," Wahidi said. "They can be a doctor, an engineer, a soldier to kill Israelis. But at this age they should be educating themselves."

There are lots of ways you can learn to kill joos without strapping a bomb to yourself! Why, you can be a bus driver, and drive them off a cliff! Or you can be a fireman and burn them to death! Yes, Achmed, there is a whole future waiting for you with endless career choices you can use to rid the world of those pesky Jews. So, don't throw blow your life away - invest in your future!

(Cross-posted at SnappedShot.com)